So, those of you fortunate enough to be mommies or daddies, how has this affected your music? Are you playing differently? Do you take music more or less seriously? Is being a parent a "burden" on your music life? Who watches the little one(s) on gig night? Does your little one want to be a musician? My daughter just turned six, and she's constantly telling me about her band. They're always playing Golden West, or so she tells me Being a single father, I've got lots to say on this, but I'd like to hear from some other folks before I say my bit.

Mr. Sheen or Mr. Foodstamps, if you've got any dead baby jokes, I heartily encourage them here!

It's definately a challenge to have kids and play out a lot. Our situation is unique in that Connie and I are both in the band, and we have an 8-month-old. When we told people she was pregnant, some people said things like, "well, there goes your band..." But, we've managed to still get things done-we just have to be smart about it. We only practice once a week as a band and we try to make it as quality as possible. We also have to be choosy about gigs-we can't just play any weeknight show that comes our way. Luckily, my neighbor watches Avery on practice nights and my wife's parents watch him for gigs. Having a child definatley puts things into perspective-if it was between music and my son I'd take him in a heartbeat and drop music. Luckily, it will never come to that and even if I can't play out I'll still make music at home and make recordings and such. I've seen people essentially give up their own children to "make it" in music, and that's just plain stupid in my opinion.

Shit, Maury! 8 months already? Shit...

Ah, yes. Friday night, in with the kiddo. My usual babysitting arrangements had some problems, so thus I am not able to attend the Rocksquawk show. And that's fine. When I made the decision to take full custody of her, I knew full well what I would be giving up in terms of my music "career." And that's fine too. My daughter is the absolute joy of my life. One of the many things I really try to do is not focusing on what I might miss. I came from Gallup to Albuquerque which, all right, isn't Austin or Seattle. But I'll tell you what, there is a music scene here. On any given night, if time allows, I could conceivably hear any type of music I wanted, performed live. I didn't have that in Gallup, and I always promised myself that my daughter would grow up somewhere that she could get exposed to jazz, classical, reggae, salsa, every genre of rock imaginable, etc, etc, ad infinitum. I know that realistically that a band based in Albuquerque, and I'm not going anywhere soon, doesn't have much of a "chance," but I've decided I don't fuckin' care. Some of the folks who have heard us have commented that stylistically, we were too all over the map. Fuck 'em. I'm going to ram it right down their fuckin' throats. Because that's other reason I came to Albuquerque. I need to play, someplace other than the fucking uninsulated garage in january when it's like 5 degrees. Yeah, I dig Albuquerque. I'm here to fucking stay(at least 'til the little one graduates )

Yeah. Babysitters at night is rough. Who wants to sit in your house while you are out? I don't have any family in town, so my options are small and I have to save most of them for my own shows. So that's where it really hurts: I don't get to see enough other bands. We should start a babysitting sharing thing... except that I don't trust any of you musicians with my kid. Actually, I trade with Tony Unit 7 sometimes. I had his kid over today.

I love how people tell you you can't be in a band anymore with a kid. Most of the people who tell me that are drunks or stoners who sleep until 2pm and then go be a waiter or wash dishes until 11pm. The rest of their time they play World of Warcraft, smoke weed, watch tv... Fuck those people. I'm twice as productive as most people who don't have a kid (and cleaner, and I read books). I just sleep less.

The only thing you lose having a kid is spontaneity, which I do miss sometimes. I'd love to be able to do stuff without having to plan two weeks in advance. Ultimately it may hold me back. Say, if I had a six month tour I'd have to find a way to take her. I'm not exactly holding my breath for that anyway though...

quote:

Originally posted by Simfonik Mike:
Mr. Sheen or Mr. Foodstamps, if you've got any dead baby jokes, I heartily encourage them here!

Being a parent of a 2.5 year old girlie myself, I don't get into the dead baby jokes as much as I did back in high school.

Have I got this right? The folks in the Giranimals have a kid and still play gigs? I have seen it done, but would not want to attempt it myself. You can't "split the bill" as far as the kid goes like my wife and I do. My hat goes off to you lot, and also to you, Mike. Having sole custody of your child can potentially make your situation roughly twice as much more difficult.

I'm with Levi, though, when it comes to not being able to get out to see other bands, especially when I am SO CLOSE TO DOWNTOWN. It is a heartbeat away! Damn! And now that the only family that I had to sit the kid in town is gone, the only chance I get to go out and see other acts is when I go out and play, which is nice when you play in two bands, but that also makes it that much more difficult with the whole kid situation and all. Now don't get me wrong. Just like Levi, I am all man, and I rule my household, and if I want to go downtown to all the bars and get all liquored up, I just tell the old lady what's up. Don't believe me? Come over sometime and I'll show you my chain saws.

Ehh. Lucky that I married a perfomer and entertainer myself. Who better to know what you have to deal with? Then again, do you really wanna deal with that attitude/ego outside of your own?

quote:

Originally posted by foodstamps:
Have I got this right? The folks in the Giranimals have a kid and still play gigs?

That's right. If our family moved away and we didn't have people that were our good friends to watch him, we'd probably not play out.

Foodstamps and Levi, thanks. It's always nice to know that I'm not "alone" in what I go through. I'm definitely with you guys about the "not going out to see shows except when hell freezes over." My parents live in town and on gig nights, she'll stay with them for the night, so it's nice that I don't have to "worry" about her, or what time I need to pick her up, etc. But if my parents moved, or god forbid, died, I don't know what the hell I'd do. Levi brings up an interesting point: What happens to the little one while you're touring? Does she go with you? Ach! I fucking love being a musician.

quote:

Originally posted by Simfonik Mike:
What happens to the little one while you're touring? Does she go with you?

For us, I could see him staying with his grandparents if it was only a say a week-long tour. Anything longer and he'd come with us.

The world population in 1850 was an estimated 1 billion. By 1930, it was 2 billion, and by 1999, 6 billion.
Six billion of us are alive today - six times as many people now as were living less than 200 years ago. Twice as many are alive now as were alive less than 50 years ago. So why make more babies, you selfish turds?
Billions more people are consuming more resources. Billions more (thanks to people like you) are poisoning Earth with more waste and pollution. Where does it end? Massive disasters, suffering, famine, starvation and wars.
The worst population problem on Earth is not in India, China or Africa. The worst population problem on the planet is the United States, because most people in this country consume and pollute many times more per person than most in India, China or Africa.
No American child has the right to live in luxury with a room full of toys and a closet full of clothes while a child in India dies from hunger.
You have no right to spoil your child rotten while a child in China suffers in the cold with no home. I have no right to more than I need while others in this world have less than they need. Your child is no more precious than a child in Africa, Haiti, Iraq or anywhere else on Earth.
If you are committed to fairness for all people now and in the future, how can you have more than one biological child? Far better yet, have no biological children.
If you love children and want to help children, help the millions of children worldwide who desperately need love, care, food and shelter. Adopt a child, become a foster parent or give money only to children's organizations that use it wisely, with no fancy offices and no highly paid staff.
For many reasons, I am glad I have no biological children. Why make more babies?

Ya, it's good that certain people don't have kids...

Yeah, that's kind of my point there, mc.

DS:"Why make more babies?"

Ha ha ha! Well, in my defense, it's only one baby from two parents, so at least I'm whittling it down. Why don't you ask your folks that same question?

good forum. it's refreshing to see that even with all the negative stereotypes of musicians, there is solid evidence here that some mighty fine parenting is taking place. my hat's off.

i've got an 11 year old son. he's been around music all his life. all in all, i'd have to say that's a good thing. he plays guitar, or i should say, he plays green day...i don't think he's all that serious about it, but i'm still proud of him. i think we can all agree that music is not only theraputic, but is also proven to help kids be better in math and sciences. while it may be tough at times for parents who are active musicians, i think that the impact on the children is extremely positive.

quote:

Originally posted by Levi Eleven:
DS:"Why make more babies?"

Ha ha ha! Well, in my defense, it's only one baby from two parents, so at least I'm whittling it down. Why don't you ask your folks that same question?

It sounds more like you are rationalizing what you know to be a selfish, irresponsible act which dooms us all. It DOOMS us! Your child is a ticking time bomb of mindless American consumerism. Did you bother to read my whole post? I said that having one kid is okay, but having none at all is the best thing for us all, dammit. Read, you! Better yet, adopt a poor little foreign baby to get bragging rights on all of your Liberal friends. Not only will it curb global warming, but it costs an assload of money and can be extremely inconvenient. Wait'll they get a load of THAT down at the Anarchists' Society!

I am also obligerd to mention that I am glad to have no car, gun, computer, big house, or air conditioning. I would not drive a car for all the money in the world, which I also don't want. I am happy to live off of the trust fund that my parents set up for me (really!).

George W Bush crime family, Jesus would not bomb, super hot red chili peppers, etc.

Oh, and also, U.S. terror gang, Bush gulags.

Dudezzz, what a bunch of dogshit. If you don't got no kidz, how you gonna get youre grass mowed or whose going to go to the fridge and get you a cold one when the old lady is out? Who is gonna go ppick up the dog shit in the back yard that the lawn mower dont get? it sure as fuck ani't gonna be this hombre. Fucking ignurant faggotz

Schrader is a fucking idiot. And in the intersets of being fair, I believe Matt's probably got kids and regardless of how I might feel about him, parenthood is respectable.

DOOMS US! DOOOOOOOOOOOOOMS!!!!! Ha ha ha! That's awesome.

I honestly am not too educated on the whole overcrowding/population issue, but I recommend PJ O'Rourke's All the Trouble in the World. Totally changed my opinion of the subject.

More on Schrader: Not only is he an idiot, but he's a fucking hypocrite. By using the internet, he's just as guilty of all the atrocities he's blaming the rest of us for. In my own case, yeah, protected sex was probably the better route to go. And I like what he said about adoption. I'm adopted. Here's the thing, though. I don't think Schrader has the right to use a computer to tell us about his trust fund while there are children in India (the world's largest democracy) are starving. There's a way to spend some money Don, you spoiled, oxygen and space consuming, whiny little bitch. And really, who the fuck does this self righteous turd think he is? Thanks Don, for spewing a bunch of shit that's really fucking irrelevant, as in has no bearing on our conversation. It kills me to say this, but Camaro Matt's post has about a thousand percent of the legitimacy yours does. Concerned about population? There's a real easy for you to cut the population of this beautiful planet by one. You fucking hypocrite.