Ywsterday, I bought a jar of Albertson's hamburger sliced pickles, not to disgrace any hamburgers with, but to drink the pickle juice and then throw the pickles and the jar in the gabage. If you're not used to it as I am, pickle juice will give you uncontrollable diarrhea for some time if you drink too much. I drank about half the jar earlier this morning. As I write this, please know and revel in the fact that I just got done daking a huge, urgent dump, loaded down with corn, sesame seeds, raisin skins, and what appear to be the tiny, chewed up remnants of the David sunflower seeds that I am so totally addicted to.

I was a bit confused at first, but then I remember that I ate quite a lot of corn last saturday. Damn, that is some nasty old corn. Usually my turnaround is about eight hours.

Anyway, if you ever feel stopped up, try the pickle juice thing. It's delicious!